I believe the ultimate goal of providing feedback is to foster growth. If it’s anything else, don't even bother! I see feedback as the essential nutrient that nurtures growth. It is an ongoing exchange of information that steers our interpersonal relations, breaks down performance barriers, and builds upon teamwork and productivity. Feedback improves self-awareness, allowing for self-reflection through others’ perception. Through feedback, we can gain a more dynamic and multi-faceted understanding of ourselves — spurring honest dialogue amongst employees to help each other grow. 

True-up your intentions: constructive or critical?

Oftentimes, it’s our intentions that dictate how we provide feedback. Ask yourself honestly why are you giving feedback. If feedback is solely focused on fixing the problem and not on helping the person learn, it is directive and one-sided; it becomes critical. 

If feedback is timely, well thought out, and guided by a higher motive, it becomes constructive and transformational. The goal is then centered around helping others improve and grow, rather than assigning blame or motivated by self-gain.

Words are powerful.

“Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world” — The Buddha.

Words ultimately determine whether your feedback is constructive or critical. Demonstrate your empathy and understanding with befitting rhetoric: use words like “consider,” “understandably,” “noticed,” or “ recommend.”

Constructive feedback is specific in nature and opens the door to transformational growth.

It also acts as a mirror, reflecting aspects of ourselves we hadn’t previously noticed. It can help reveal the blind spots of how your actions impact others and guide your next steps. Such interactions builds a person with outward awareness, and who is not confined to the singularity of self-perception.

On the flip side, words have the power to cut to the bone. Although your intent may be to correct the behavior, using harsh words like “should,” “can’t,” or “never” can end up having a counter-productive effect on the person. It may bring about varied emotions ranging from confusion, denial, anger, frustration, and even shame. In these circumstances, the person will not necessarily grow from that situation. You could end up shaking their self-esteem and confidence to perform.

A large portion of how feedback is received goes into how it has been conveyed. Be conscious of the impact of your words, and always take to heart your own feedback: there is always more than one side to a story. 

So why all this fuss about feedback?

Even though each of us has unique personalities, to collaborate and perform synergistically as a team, trust and open communication are key to healthy and solid employee relations. Understandably, it’s hard to give and receive feedback, but it’s a privilege and opportunity to invest in your relationships. Constructive feedback is that foundation that can guide your productive, healthy, and nurturing interactions with others. 

Feedback is the backbone of personal and professional growth. With practice and patience, we will become more adept at giving and receiving constructive feedback.

Have an opinion? I’d love to get your feedback! Leave your thoughts in the comments below, or get in touch.